A boy asked a beautiful girl in a library… “Do you mind if I sit beside you”? The girl answered with a loud angry voice; “I don’t want to spend the night with you!!” All the people in the library started staring at the boy shooting daggers in his direction. The girl then whispered to…
She did what he said. The retiring mailman, The mailman who had been on the same route for 10 years was leaving the job. He had made many friends on the route and decided to put a note in their mailboxes informing them. Many on his route came out of their houses to wish him…
An old priest died and arrived at the Gates of Heaven. Next to him was a young Uber driver who died seconds ago from his reckless driving. The priest was called first, and St Peter said, “For your life long career working for the church, we will give you a small studio where you can…
A blonde is going door to door trying to find some paying work. She knocks on one door and an older man opens it up. “Hey mister, do you have any odd jobs I could do for cash?” He looks her up and down and surmises that she’s an idiot whom he can take advantage…
A man dies and goes to Hell. Satan greets him and says, “Welcome to hell, Dave. First, the Wi-fi password is… “Dave says, “Wait, you guys have wi-fi?” Satan replies, “Of course we do.” “That’s certainly not bad at all” says Dave. Satan continues, “So, as I was saying, the wi-fi password is the number…
A drunk man stumbles out of bar and runs into 2 priest. The drunk man looks at the 1st priest and says,”Hey, I’m Jesus Christ. “The 1st priest tells the man, “No, my son, you’re not.” Then the man turns to the 2nd priest and says the same thing. “Hey, I’m Jesus Christ.” The 2nd…
An exercise for people who are out of shape Begin with a 5kg potato bag in each hand. Extend your arms straight out from your sides, hold them there for a full minute, and then relax. After a few weeks, move up to 10kg potato bags and stay there for a week or two. Then…
The madam opened the door to see a rather dignified, Well-dressed good looking man in his late 40s or early 50s. “May I help you?” she asked. “I want to see Valerie,” the man replied. “Sir, Valerie is one of our most expensive ladies. Perhaps you would prefer someone else,” said the madam. “No. I…
A lady approaches a priest and tells him, “Father, I have a problem. I have these two talking female parrots, but they only know how to say one thing. They keep saying “Hi, we’re hot. Do you want a date?” “That’s terrible!” the priest exclaimed. “But I do have a solution to your problem. Bring…
A man absolutely hated his wife’s cat and decided to get rid of him. One day by driving him 20 blocks from his home and leaving him at the park… As he was getting home, the cat was walking up the driveway. The next day he decided to drive the cat 40 blocks away. He…
