A farmer buys a young rooster… As soon as he gets it home, the rooster scrw all the farmer’s 150 hens. The farmer is impressed. At lunch, the rooster scrws all 150 hens again. The next day, the rooster bang the ducks and the geese. Sadly, later that day, the farmer finds the rooster laying…
A Finnish lumberjack moves to Canada for work Towards the end of his first work day, the foreman comes to speak to him, “So, how much work have you gotten done?” “I’ve made 64 logs.” the Finn responds. “Well that’s not enough, we agreed on 100 logs everyday” the foreman said while shaking his head,…
A woman was at her hairdresser’s getting her hair styled for a trip to Rome with her husband. She mentioned the trip to the hairdresser, who responded: “Rome? Why would anyone want to go there? It’s crowded and dirty. You’re crazy to go to Rome. So, how are you getting there?” “We’re taking Continental,” was…
A guy wakes up with a huge hangover and no recollection of his night out with his mates Slowly opening his eyes, he sees a bottle of aspirin and a glass of water on the bedside table. He looks around the room to find his clothes are on the dresser, neatly folded, with a clean…
A man lays sprawled across three entire seats at a posh theater. Before the show has even started, an usher walks by and notices the man. “Sir, you’re only allowed one seat, can you please sit up? “The man groans, but remains seated. The Usher becoming impatient with the man, “sir, if you don’t get…
A woman, cranky because her husband was late coming home again, decided to leave a note, saying, “I’ve had enough and have left you. Don’t bother coming after me.” Then she hide under the bed to see his reaction. After a short while, the husband comes home and she could hear him in the kitchen…
A rich dude and his wife were having dinner at a fancy joint. This absolutely stunning young woman comes over to the table, gives the husband a big open-mouthed kiss, then says she’ll see him later and walks away. The wife glares at him: “Who the hell was that ? “Oh”, replies the husband casually,…
A new widow requested the epitaph “Rest in Peace” for her husband’s tombstone. When she later found he had left his fortune to his mistress, she attempted to get the engraver to change the carving. This was impossible; the words were chiseled and could not be changed. “In that case,” she said, “please add Until…
Jim was annoyed when his blonde wife told him that a car had backed into her, damaging a fender, and that she hadn’t gotten the license number. “What kind of car was he driving?” he asked. “I don’t know,” she said. “I never can tell one car from another.” At that, Jim decided the time…
The insurance man was explaining the benefits of his policy over those of his competitors. “If you fall from the eighty-fifth story of the Empire State Building, just for argument’s sake, and if you hit the ground, we pay you double indemnity. We pay you $15 a week for as long as you live. And…